I often find myself thinking about my husband's impending deployment next fall and the separation we will endure. We have done this once before, but every time is different. I like to think that this time will be easier for me, seeing as I have done this before, plus this time I will have a job to keep me busy and preoccupied, but you just never know.
I also got to thinking, if I had the choice to accompany him to Iraq (or Afghanistan), would I? If they made it so that spouses could join their soldier and live with them on the FOB(Forward Operating Base) in a small apartment, would I do it? Knowing that I would be under the same dangers as the soldiers are when on the FOB, would I take the chance to be with my husband?
Honestly, I do not think I could handle it. I already take medication for anxiety. I think the constant worry about whether the FOB could be attacked would be too much for me. I know that when my husband was over there there were instances of nearby shelling and people would have to go take cover. Once he said they were in the Chow Hall and all the guys who stayed on the FOB (Fobbits) went to take cover, and those that normally left on missions just stayed there to enjoy their meal or take advantage of a shorter line!!
I miss my husband terribly when he is gone, but at least I know I am safe here. I want to do what is best for his morale and that would also influence me going over with him. If he felt that he would do better with me there, I think I would go ahead and go. However, if I was worrying all the time and an emotional wreck over it, I don't think I would be any good to him and may be more of a detriment to his morale.
I guess it is a really good thing we cannot go along on deployments!!