A class meeting at work yesterday prompted memories for me of a time when I was a new army wife and I heard that something was said about me that really upset me. I blogged about it back then and you can read it HERE. I also did a follow up and that can be found HERE
I thought I would revisit the incident and talk a little more about what I learned from it.
While TJ was deployed a friend told me that her husband told her that fellow soldiers were saying I did not treat my husband nicely. I was devastated by this. At first I could not imagine why someone would say that, but I soon came up with some ideas. When I was able to finally speak to my husband he had his own idea(you can read all the details in the highlighted posts).
In any case, with the situations it could have stemmed from, no one really knew the whole situation and what was going on. My husband and I resolved things in those incidents and did what was best for us. He said that he had no complaints about the way I treated him and that was all that mattered.
I had my suspicions back then about who may have started saying such things. Now, I know there may have been a couple of people. And I still don't why they said those things. Nothing better to do I guess. Maybe their wives did not treat them well!!
The fact of the matter is, no matter what, people will talk about you. Especially in the army. Gossip is rampant. You really have to develop a thick skin and have confidence in yourself and your relationship in order to overcome it.
A few months ago I had a situation where I was afraid someone would start saying bad things about me and I got worried. Then I thought, why? I knew why I made the decision I did. I knew what was right for me. The person whom I feared would start saying things did not have much credibility to begin with. As far as I know, nothing ever was said. It is silly to even worry about things before they happen!!
If the same thing was said about me today about not being nice to TJ I would probably just say, WHATEVER! They don't know me. Or him. I would probably blog about the experience again, but I would not stress out about it.
It's just one of those thigs that can happen to an army wife.