Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Good, the Bad and All Unexpected

Yesterday was a very trying day with one bright spot. I will go in order.

Early in the morning I took TJ to the airport to go to Florida for 2 weeks. As is the case at our local airport there were soldiers going back from R&R and seeing their sad wives got to me. I felt so bad for them. When I got home I cried. This is partly because I am on my period, partly because I did not even want TJ leaving for a mere 2 weeks. I think i would have been more okay with it if he had not been gone for all of July and we have only had a week to spend together(mostly on the road) before he left again. At least this is a vacation for him and we can talk everyday. Anyway, after crying, I fell back asleep.

Later, I receieved a call from the school secretary letting me know they were unveiling the renovated school at 1pm. This made me excited. I couldn't wait to see it. In the meantime I ran some errands in Manhattan(including getting a Jimmy Johns sandwich). When it was time to go see the school I was full of butterflies. When I got there I felt like I was seeing family again. I truly love my job and the people I work with. And the school -- it was amazing!!! I feel like I am going to a whole new job! They did an awesome job. I am looking forward to starting again on Thursday.

The rest of the day wasn't too good. I started to unpack some stuff from my mom's house and it depressed me. I was fighting a headache and cramps. I missed TJ. An evening nap did not help. When TJ called me it wasn't in private and that bothered me. I read before bed and when it was time to go to sleep I almost had an anxiety attack. Luckily I had some Xanax left over from my trips. I cried a lot before it really kicked in.

I feel guilty for feeling bad about TJ being gone. I went on two one-week vacations without him so I should not be upset he is taking 2 weeks without me. I think it is just the timing.

I think I will feel better when I go back to work this week.

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