Saturday, November 13, 2010

Done

As of today I am done being a part of my husband's company and battalion. I will not be attending any more meetings, I will not help with any fundraising and I will not be attending any social events. This has been something that has been a long time coming. I have given them chance after chance to prove me wrong in my opinion of them and at every turn they let me down.

The information I have just learned is the last straw. It is my husband's job and I want nothing to do with it. They say that it is not just a job it is a life and it is a life I do not want anymore. I am proud to be an army wife, but not where we are now. They say that what I do affects my husband, but in this case it doesn't. I have been nothing but supportive, Even when I didn't agree with many many things. I still support my husband wholeheartedly, but it will not be in the capacity of being a part of his company and battalion. I don't believe with these people what I do matters one way or another. And I am tired of being disappointed. Tired of trusting and giving the benefit of the doubt then being let down every time.

I think the best thing for myself and my husband is to take myself out of the equation. His job is his job and nothing else. I have my own job and my own life and do not have to be a part of his job. Yes, I have a life in the army, but I am limiting what that life entails. It drains me. It hurts me. And it screws me. I would rather put my energy into a life that enriches and energizes and rewards me. I have that life with my job and my friends and my family. That does not include my husband's company and battalion. They do not need me and I certainly do not need them. I believe the best way I can support my husband and be a good wife to him is to wash my hands of it.

And that is what I have done.

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